課文全文翻譯參考譯文u2-資料下載頁(yè)
2025-06-18 01:12本頁(yè)面
【正文】 wn and push around. 上述這些區(qū)別可以解釋為什么在婚姻內(nèi)的交流問(wèn)題上，男女抱有如此不同的期望。對(duì)女性來(lái)說(shuō)，交談可以使關(guān)系親密?；橐鲫P(guān)系是一種無(wú)比密切的關(guān)系：你可以說(shuō)出你的感受和想法，對(duì)方會(huì)依然愛(ài)著你。女性最大的恐懼是被排斥。但是，男人生活在一種等級(jí)分明的世界里，談話的目的是保持自己的獨(dú)立性與地位。他們必須時(shí)刻警惕，保護(hù)自己，以免受人壓制或受人擺布。 This explains the paradox of the talkative man who said of his silent wife,She39。s the talker. In the public setting, he felt challenged to show his intelligence and display his understanding. But at home, where he has nothing to prove and no one to defend against, he is free to remain silent. For hi wife, being home means she is free from the worry that something she says might offend someone, or spark disagreement, or appear to be showing off。 at home she is free to talk. 這一點(diǎn)也解釋了那個(gè)健談的男人說(shuō)他那沉默的妻子“她才能說(shuō)呢”這種矛盾局面。在公共場(chǎng)合，他覺(jué)得迫不得已要表現(xiàn)自己的聰穎、展示自己的理解力。但在家里，他不需要證明什么，也不需要提防任何人，所以他不想說(shuō)話就不說(shuō)話。對(duì)他的妻子來(lái)說(shuō)，在家意味著不必?fù)?dān)心自己說(shuō)的話會(huì)得罪別人，或者引發(fā)矛盾，或者顯得炫耀自己。在家里，她可以想說(shuō)什么就說(shuō)什么。 The munication problems that endanger marriage can39。t be fixed by mechanical engineering. They require a new conceptual framework about the role of talk in human relationships. Many of the psychological explanations may not be helpful, because they tend to blame either women(for not being assertive enough) or men(for not being in touch with their feelings). A sociolinguistic approach by which malefemale conversation is seen as crosscultural munication allows us to understand the problem and forge solutions without blaming either party. 交流問(wèn)題威脅著婚姻，但不能通過(guò)機(jī)械的手段來(lái)修補(bǔ)。這些問(wèn)題要求我們用一種新觀念來(lái)看待談話在人際關(guān)系中所起的作用。從心理學(xué)的角度所作的許多解釋都無(wú)濟(jì)于事，因?yàn)檫@些解釋往往責(zé)怪女性（不夠自信），或者責(zé)怪男性（不關(guān)心她們的感情）。如果從社會(huì)語(yǔ)言學(xué)的角度，將男女對(duì)話看作跨文化交流，我們便會(huì)理解這個(gè)問(wèn)題，找到問(wèn)題的答案，而又不責(zé)怪任何一方。 Once the problem is understood, improvement es naturally. Women who feel abandoned and deprived when their husbands won39。t listen to or report daily news may be happy to discover their husbands trying to adapt once they understand the place of small talk in women39。s relationships. But if their husbands don39。t adapt, the women may still be forted that for men, this is not a failure of intimacy. Accepting the difference, the wives may look to their friends or family for that kind of talk. And husbands who can39。t provide it shouldn39。t feel their wives have made unreasonable demands. Some couples will still decide to divorce, but an least their decisions will be based on realistic expectations. 一旦問(wèn)題得到理解，情況自然有所改善。那些通常因丈夫不傾聽(tīng)或不談?wù)撁刻彀l(fā)生的事情而感到被遺棄、感到喪失生活樂(lè)趣的女性會(huì)高興地發(fā)現(xiàn)，她們的丈夫一旦知道了不起眼的談話在女性關(guān)系中的地位后，正努力地在適應(yīng)。如果丈夫不適應(yīng)，妻子仍然能夠得到安慰，因?yàn)樗?，?duì)男人來(lái)說(shuō)，這不是不親密的表現(xiàn)。當(dāng)妻子接受了男女存在區(qū)別這一事實(shí)后，便會(huì)去找自己的朋友或家人說(shuō)一說(shuō)話。那些不能夠給予妻子談話快樂(lè)的丈夫，也不應(yīng)該覺(jué)得妻子提出了無(wú)理要求。仍然會(huì)有一些夫妻決定離婚，但起碼他們的決定是建立在比較現(xiàn)實(shí)的期望基礎(chǔ)上的。
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