【正文】 Joey: Look, it was a job all right? Chandler: 39。Look, Gippetto, I39。m a real live boy.39。 Joey: I will not take this abuse. (Walks to the door and opens it to leave.) Chandler: You39。re right, I39。m sorry. (Burst into song and dances out of the door.) Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy... Joey: You should both know, that he39。s a dead man. Oh, Chandler? (Starts after Chandler.) Monica: So how you doing today? Did you sleep okay? Talk to Barry? I can39。t stop smiling. Rachel: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth. Monica: I know, he39。s just so, so... Do you remember you and Tony DeMarco? Rachel: Oh, yeah. Monica: Well, it39。s like that. With feelings. Rachel: Oh wow. Are you in trouble. Monica: Big time! Rachel: Want a wedding dress? Hardly used. Monica: I think we are getting a little ahead of selves here. Okay. Okay. I am just going to get up, go to work and not think about him all day. Or else I39。m just gonna get up and go to work. Rachel: Oh, look, wish me luck! Monica: What for? Rachel: I39。m gonna go get one of those (Thinks) job things. (Monica exits.) [Scene: Iridium, Monica is working as Frannie enters.] Frannie: Hey, Monica! Monica: Hey Frannie, wele back! How was Florida? Frannie: You had sex, didn39。t you? Monica: How do you do that? Frannie: Oh, I hate you, I39。m pushing my Aunt Roz through Parrot Jungle and you39。re having sex! So? Who? Monica: You know Paul? Frannie: Paul the Wine Guy? Oh yeah, I know Paul. Monica: You mean you know Paul like I know Paul? Frannie: Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul. Y39。know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years. [Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Rachel is there.] Joey: (sitting on the arm of the couch)Of course it was a line! Monica: Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that? Ross: I assume we39。re looking for an answer more sophisticated than 39。to get you into bed39。. Monica: I hate men! I hate men! Phoebe: Oh no, don39。t hate, you don39。t want to put that out into the universe. Monica: Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear? Phoebe: All right, c39。mere, gimme your feet. (She starts massaging them.) Monica: I just thought he was nice, y39。know? Joey: (bursts out laughing again) I can39。t believe you didn39。t know it was a line! (Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.) Rachel: Guess what? Ross: You got a job? Rachel: Are you kidding? I39。m trained for nothing! I was laughed out of twelve interviews today. Chandler: And yet you39。re surprisingly upbeat. Rachel: You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fifty percent off! Chandler: Oh, how well you know me... Rachel: They39。re my new 39。I don39。t need a job, I don39。t need my parents, I39。ve got great boots39。 boots! Monica: How39。d you pay for them? Rachel: Uh, credit card. Monica: And who pays for that? Rachel: Um... my... father. [Scene: Monica and Rachel39。s, everyone is sitting around the kitchen table. Rachel39。s credit cards are spread out on the table along with a pair of scissors.] Rachel: Oh God, e on you guys, is this really necessary? I mean, I can stop charging anytime I want. Monica: C39。mon, you can39。t live off your parents your whole life. Rachel: I know that. That39。s why I was getting married. Phoebe: Give her a break, it39。s hard being on your own for the first time. Rachel: Thank you. Phoebe: You39。re wele. I remember when I first came to this city. I was fourteen. My mom had just killed herself and my stepdad was back in prison, and I got here, and I didn39。t know anybody. And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like, cleaning windshields outside port authority, and then he killed himself, and then I found aromatherapy. So believe me, I know exactly how you feel. (Pause) Ross: The word you39。re looking for is 39。Anyway39。... Monica: All right, you ready? Rachel: No. No, no, I39。m not ready! How can I be ready? Hey, Rach! You ready to jump out the airplane without your parachute? Come on, I can39。t do this! Monica: You can, I know you can! Rachel: I don39。t think so. Ross: Come on, you made coffee! You can do anything! (Chandler slowly tries to hide the now dead plant from that morning when he and Joey poured their coffee into it.) Ross: C39。mon, cut. Cut, cut, cut,... All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut... (She cuts one of them and they cheer.) Rachel: Y39。know what? I think we can just leave it at that. It39。s kinda like a symbolic gesture... Monica: Rachel! That was a library card! All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut.. Chandler: (as Rachel is cutting up her cards) Y39。know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream. (She finishes cutting them up and they all cheer.) Monica: Wele to the real world! It sucks. You39。re gonna love it! [Time Lapse, Rachel and Ross are watching a TV channel finishes it39。s broadcast day by playing the national anthem.] Monica: Well, that39。s it (To Ross) You gonna crash on the couch? Ross: No. No, I gotta go home sometime. Monica: You be okay? Ross: Yeah. Rachel: Hey Mon, look what I just found on the floor. (Monica smiles.) What? Monica: That39。s Paul39。s watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy. Alright. Goodnight, everybody. Ross and Rachel: Goodnight. (Monica stomps on Paul39。s watch and goes into her room.) Ross: Mmm. (They both reach for the last cookie) Oh, no Rachel: Sorry Ross: No no no, go Rachel: No, you have it, really, I don39。t want it Ross: Split it? Rachel: Okay. Ross: Okay. (They split it.) You know you probably didn39。t know this, but back in high school, I had a, um, major crush on you. Rachel: I knew. Ross: You did! Oh.... I always f