【文章內(nèi)容簡(jiǎn)介】 psychological wound 因?yàn)?，你無(wú)法治愈心理上的創(chuàng)傷.if you don39。t even know you39。re injured.如果你都不知道自己受到了傷害的話。Loneliness isn39。t the only psychological wound that distorts our perceptions and misleads us.孤獨(dú)不是唯一，可能扭曲及誤導(dǎo)我們的心理創(chuàng)傷。 Failure does that as well.失敗也有同樣效果。I once visited a day care center, where I saw three toddlers play with identical plastic toys. 我曾訪問(wèn)過(guò)一個(gè)幼兒園，在那兒我觀察了三個(gè)兒童，在玩完全一樣的塑料玩具。You had to slide the red button, and a cute doggier would pop out. 你得把一個(gè)紅色的鈕滑開，然后一個(gè)可愛(ài)的小狗就會(huì)跳出來(lái)。One little girl tried pulling the purple button, then pushing it, and then she just sat back and looked at the box, with her lower lip trembling. 一個(gè)小女孩對(duì)紫色的鈕又拉又按，然后她就坐下來(lái)，瞧著那盒子，下嘴唇開始發(fā)顫。The little boy next to her watched this happen, then turned to his box and burst into tears without even touching it. 她旁邊的一個(gè)小男孩看到這一幕，再看看他的盒子，都沒(méi)動(dòng)手就哇哇大哭了。Meanwhile, another little girl tried everything she could think of until she slid the red button, the cute doggier popped out, and she squealed with delight. 與此同時(shí)，另一個(gè)小女孩試了各種方法直到她滑動(dòng)了那個(gè)紅鈕，可愛(ài)的小狗跳了出來(lái)，她開心的叫了起來(lái)。So three toddlers with identical plastic toys, but with very different reactions to failure.同樣的塑料玩具給了這三個(gè)幼兒，但他們對(duì)失敗的反應(yīng)截然不同。 The first two toddlers were perfectly capable of sliding a red button. 前兩個(gè)小孩完全有能力滑動(dòng)那個(gè)紅鈕。The only thing that prevented them from succeeding was that their mind tricked them into believing they could not. 唯一阻止他們成功的因素就是他們被自己做不成的想法給騙了。Now, adults get tricked this way as well, all the time. 成年人也經(jīng)常中這樣的圈套。In fact, we all have a default set of feelings and beliefs that gets triggered whenever we encounter frustrations and setbacks. 事實(shí)上，我們都有一個(gè)固定的思維感知模式，每當(dāng)我們感到沮喪，受到挫折，我們便會(huì)進(jìn)入這個(gè)模式。Are you aware of how your mind reacts to failure? You need to be. 你清不清楚你是怎么對(duì)應(yīng)失敗的？你應(yīng)該清楚。Because if your mind tries to convince you you39。re incapable of something and you believe it, then like those two toddlers, you39。ll begin to feel helpless and you39。ll stop trying too soon,or you won39。t even try at all.因?yàn)槿绻愕念^腦告訴你你不能做成什么事而你相信了的話，你就會(huì)像那前兩個(gè)小孩似的，開始感到無(wú)助 然后你就很快放棄了，甚至都不去試一下。 And then you39。ll be even more convinced you can39。t succeed.然后你就更加確信你成功不了。 You see, that39。s why so many people function below their actual potential.你看，這就是為什么那么多人都無(wú)法充分發(fā)揮他們的潛能。Because some where along the way, sometimes a single failure convinced them that they couldn39。t succeed, and they believed it.因?yàn)椴灰欢ㄔ谑裁吹胤?，有那么一次失敗，讓他們認(rèn)定了自己不能成功。Once we bee convinced of something, it39。s very difficult to change our mind.我們一旦被某件事說(shuō)服，往往就很難改變主意。I learned that lesson the hard way when I was a teenager with my brother.我十幾歲的時(shí)候，和我哥哥一起，吃了點(diǎn)苦頭才明白這道理。We were driving with friends down a dark road at night, when a police car stopped us.有一天晚上，我倆和朋友們?cè)谝粭l很黑的路上開著車一輛警車把我們攔下了。There had been a robbery in the area and they were looking for suspects.附近發(fā)生了搶劫，警察在追蹤嫌犯。The officer approached the car, and he shined his flashlight on the driver, then on my brother in the front seat, and then on me.警察走到車邊，對(duì)司機(jī)晃了晃手電筒，又照了照坐在副駕駛的我哥哥，然后照到了我。 And his eyes opened wide and he said,”where have I seen your face before?”And I said,”In the front seat.”他瞪大了眼睛說(shuō)得，“我在哪兒見(jiàn)過(guò)你？”我說(shuō)，“副駕駛座上?！盉ut that made no sense to him whatsoever. 但對(duì)他來(lái)說(shuō)，我的回答莫名奇妙。So now he thought I was on drugs.所以他認(rèn)為我磕了藥。So he drags me out of the car, he searches me, he marches me over to the police car, and only when he verified I didn39。t have a police record, could I show him I had a twin in the front seat.于是他把我拖出車子，有搜了我的身，他把我押到警車那兒，直到他驗(yàn)證了我并沒(méi)有犯罪記錄，我才有機(jī)會(huì)解釋我和副駕駛座位上的是 雙胞胎。But even as we were driving away, you could see by the look on his face he was convinced that I was getting away with something.但是直到我們開走了，你仍可以看到他的表情他認(rèn)定了我一定干了什么壞事。Our mind is hard to change once we bee convinced.一旦我們認(rèn)定了的事情，我們很難改變看法。So it might be very natural to feel demoralized a