【正文】 hat “women can’t be friends”, but they also admit sometimes that for women “it’s a different thing”.And many French people doubt the possibility of a friendship between a man and a is also the kind of relationship within a group – men and women who have worked together for a long time, who may be very close, sharing great loyalty and warmth of may call one another copains – a word that in English bees “friends” but has more the feeling of “pals” or “buddies”.In French eyes this is not friendship, although two members of such a group may well be the French, friendship is a onetoone relationship that demands a keen awareness of the other person’s intellect, temperament(性情)and particular friend is someone who draws out your own best qualities, with whom you sparkle and bee more of whatever the friendship draws political philosophy assumes more depth, appreciation of a play bees sharper, taste in food or wine is accentuated, enjoyment of a sport is intensified(加強(qiáng)的).And French friendships are partmentalized(區(qū)分).A man may play chess with a friend for thirty years without knowing his political opinions, or he may talk politics with him for as long a time without knowing about his personal friends fill different niches in each person’s friendships are not made part of family friend is not expected to spend evenings being nice to children or courteous(有禮貌的)to a deaf duties, also serious and enjoined, are primarily for who are friends may meet in a fiends may meet in larger groups for evenings of people may meet at the little bistro(小酒館)where they drink and talk, far from the does not affect such friendships。wives do not have to be taken into the past in France, friendships of this kind seldom were open to any but intellectual most women’s lives centered on their homes, their warmest relations with other women often went back to their special relationship of friendship is based on what the French value most – on the mind, on patibility(兼容性)of outlook, on vivid awareness of some chosen area of heightens the sense of each person’s relationships manding as great loyalty and devotion have a different World War II the first resistance groups formed in Paris were built on the foundations of les significantly, as time went on these little groups, whose lives rested in one another’s hands, called themselves “families”.Where each had a total responsibility for all, it was kinship ties that provided the even today such ties, crossing every line of class and personal interest, remain binding on(對(duì)…有約束力)the survivors of these small secret ，法國(guó)人也認(rèn)為朋友一般指同性，而且友誼主要指男人間的人際關(guān)系。對(duì)于?女人之間不可能成為朋友?的觀點(diǎn)，法國(guó)婦女嗤之以鼻，不過她們有時(shí)也承認(rèn)，?女人間的友誼是另外一回事?。許多法國(guó)人對(duì)男人與女人之間是否會(huì)有友誼感到懷疑。還有一種群體內(nèi)的人際關(guān)系——包括男女在內(nèi)的一些人在一起工作多年，可能關(guān)系不錯(cuò)、彼此信任、感情融洽。他們彼此稱為法語(yǔ)里的copains，這個(gè)詞譯成英語(yǔ)就是?朋友?，不過更具?哥們?或?姐妹?的感情色彩。在法國(guó)人的眼里，這不是友誼，當(dāng)然這個(gè)群體里的某兩個(gè)人之間完全可以成為朋友。對(duì)法國(guó)人來說，友誼是一種一對(duì)一的人際關(guān)系，要求雙方了解彼此的智力、性格以及特殊的興趣。朋友是能把你最優(yōu)秀的品質(zhì)發(fā)揮出來的人。和他在一起，你才氣橫溢，無論你們的友誼源于哪方面，你在這方面會(huì)變得更加充實(shí)。你對(duì)政治的見解會(huì)深化，你對(duì)戲劇的鑒賞力會(huì)更加敏銳，你對(duì)美食和美酒的品嘗會(huì)更盡興，你對(duì)某項(xiàng)運(yùn)動(dòng)的愛好會(huì)加強(qiáng)。法國(guó)式的友誼有具體的分工。一個(gè)人可能與一位朋友下了三十年的棋而不知道他的政治觀點(diǎn)，也可能與他談?wù)摿巳甑恼?，而不了解他的私人生活。不同的朋友在每個(gè)人的生活中有不同的作用。他們不介入家庭生活。而必盡的義務(wù)主要由家屬承擔(dān)。幾個(gè)男性朋友會(huì)聚在咖啡館里；有學(xué)識(shí)的朋友會(huì)發(fā)起更大的聚會(huì)談上數(shù)個(gè)晚上；工人們會(huì)聚在遠(yuǎn)離家庭的小酒吧里，喝酒、閑侃。這種友誼不受婚姻的影響，而且建立友誼時(shí)不必考慮妻子的情況。在從前的法國(guó)，這種友誼只接納知識(shí)婦女，很少接納其他婦女。因?yàn)榇蠖鄶?shù)婦女的生活是以家庭為中心，她們與其他女性的親密關(guān)系通常是從少女時(shí)代就建立起來的。友誼這種特殊的關(guān)系的基礎(chǔ)是法國(guó)人最為珍視的東西——是思想，是觀點(diǎn)的一致，是對(duì)生活中某一方面的鮮明的意識(shí)。In Germany, in contrast with France, friendship is much more articulately(清晰地)a matter of , boys and girls form deeply sentimental attachments, walk and talk together – not so much to polish their wits as to share their hopes and fears and dreams, to form a mon front against the world of school and family and to join in a kind of mutual discovery of each other’s and their own inner the family, the closest relationship over a lifetime is between brothers and the family, men and women find in their closest friends of the same sex the devotion of a sister, the loyalty of a , in Germany friends usually are brought into the call their father’s and their mothers friends “uncle” and “aunt”.Between French friends, who have chosen each other for the congeniality(意氣相投)of their point of view, lively disagreement and sharpness of argument are the breath of for Germans, whose friendships are based on mutuality of feeling, deep disagreement on any subject that matters to both is regarded as a ties of kinship, ties of friendship are meant to be irrevocably(不能取消的) Germans who e to the United States have great difficulty in establishing such friendships with view friendship more tentatively, subject to changes in intensity as people move, change their jobs, marry, or discover new ，在德國(guó)，友誼更明確地說是個(gè)感情問題。少男少女之間建立起深厚的感情，他們一起散步，一起聊天。這一切不是為了提高自己的智慧，而是相互分享彼此的愿望、憂患和夢(mèng)想，共同對(duì)付學(xué)校和家庭組成的世界，發(fā)現(xiàn)彼此的內(nèi)心世界。家庭之內(nèi)，一個(gè)人一生最親密的關(guān)系是兄弟姐妹之間的關(guān)系。家庭之外，同性摯友之間像姐妹一樣親密，像兄弟一樣真誠(chéng)。大致說來，在德國(guó)，朋友經(jīng)常被帶到家里。孩子們稱呼父母的朋友為叔叔和阿姨。觀點(diǎn)相投而成為朋友的法國(guó)人之間，鮮明的分歧和激烈的爭(zhēng)論是這種關(guān)系所不可少的。但是德國(guó)人的友誼是建立在相互感情的基礎(chǔ)之上的。對(duì)他們來說，如果在雙方都認(rèn)為重要的問題上親生了尖銳的分歧，那就是極大的不幸。朋友關(guān)系與親緣關(guān)系一樣具有絕對(duì)的約束力。來到美國(guó)的年輕的德國(guó)人，很難與美國(guó)人建立起這樣的友誼關(guān)系。我們不把友誼看得那樣一成不變，友誼的深淺隨著人們的搬遷、調(diào)換工作、婚嫁，或興趣的改變而變化。English friendships follow still a different basis is shared at different stages of life may be of very different kinds – discovering a mon interest in school, serving together in the armed forces, taking part in a foreign mission, staying in the same country house during a the midst of the activity, whatever it may be, people fall into step – sometimes two men or two women, sometimes two couples, sometimes three people – and find that they walk or play a game or tell stories or serve on a tiresome and exacting mittee with the same easy anticipation(希望，預(yù)感)of what each will do day by day or in some critical who have made English friends ment that, even years later, “you can take up just where you left off.” Meeting after a long interval, friends are like a couple who begin to dance again when the orchestra strikes up after a friendships are formed outside the family circle, but they are not, as in Germany, contrapuntal to the family nor are they, as in France, separated from the a break in an Engl