【正文】
寫作要求: ,適當(dāng)拓展想象空間,靈活地將提供的信息體現(xiàn)在文章中?! ?,語句通順,書寫清晰、規(guī)范。 . [學(xué)生習(xí)作A] My hobby is read books①。When I was seven years became interested in reading like needing books because there are a lot of useful things in can learn a lot of knowledge from books. Books also② can teach me how to be a good even can solve many problems for will read more good books to improve myself. ①改為reading books,動詞作表語時(shí)應(yīng)該用動名詞?! 、赼lso的位置應(yīng)放在can之后?! 點(diǎn)評]:檔次911分?! 、僖c(diǎn)不全,漏掉最后一個(gè)要點(diǎn)?! 、诰渥踊緹o誤,能正確傳遞信息給讀者但文章不流暢,句子與句子之間過渡不自然,給讀者感覺在回答上述問題?! 、塾猩倭垮e(cuò)誤。 [學(xué)生習(xí)作B] My hobby is books is very I was young ,my mother used to tell me a story went to bed every stories were so interesting that I always felt they weren’t I began to read books by by little I became interested in can learn much knowledge and many interesting things all over the I read books,I can enjoy the beautiful the same time I can improve my want to be a writer in the future,so I must study hard and read more books so that my dream can e true. ?、匍_門見山、點(diǎn)題?! 、谡媲榱髀?,理由充分?! 、畚闹袔Φ倪B詞使用得恰當(dāng),使文章過渡自然、 ?、芮擅钍褂镁湫鸵员頉Q心。 [點(diǎn)評]:檔次1314分?! 、偾宄磉_(dá)寫作目的,要點(diǎn)齊全?! 、谡Z言表達(dá)靈活多樣,字里行間流露出真情實(shí)感,文章有感染力?! 、矍‘?dāng)使用連詞和從句,語言流暢,且無錯(cuò)誤,是一篇高質(zhì)量的作文?! 高分突破] ①文體:記敘文?! 、谝c(diǎn):what → when →how → why → hope and plan for the future. ?、蹠r(shí)態(tài):一般現(xiàn)在時(shí),一般過去時(shí),一般將來時(shí)的自然變化?! ?nèi)容具有開放性,但它也是“控制性”的寫作試題,因此不能隨意發(fā)揮,要善于抓信息,寫完要點(diǎn)。選用這兩篇學(xué)生真實(shí)習(xí)作,一是因?yàn)樗麄冞x材相同,二是因?yàn)樗麄兌际怯⒄Z成績優(yōu)秀的同學(xué)。同學(xué)B靈活使用連詞so…that,so,little by little,when,so that等,恰到好處地使用新句型和短語used to,became interested in,e true……等,使內(nèi)容豐富,讀起來優(yōu)美流暢。其實(shí)這些表達(dá)同學(xué)A也會,只是缺乏技術(shù)加工。通過這兩篇作文點(diǎn)評,同學(xué)們便能悟出其中的奧妙。中考作文時(shí),由于時(shí)間緊、內(nèi)容多,同學(xué)們出錯(cuò)在所難免。因此,改錯(cuò)這一環(huán)節(jié)必不可少。中考作文評卷是根據(jù)要點(diǎn)、語言準(zhǔn)確性、上下文的連貫性來給分,根據(jù)錯(cuò)誤多少來扣分。因此中考時(shí)書面表達(dá)應(yīng)做到先打草稿,寫完后多讀幾遍,檢查是否有誤,然后再抄到試卷上,注意字跡要工整,不涂、不畫、不勾不抹,避免不必要的扣分。(1)看字?jǐn)?shù)是否達(dá)到要求,看有無遺漏要點(diǎn)?! ?2)看文體格式是否正確規(guī)范。 (3)看有無語法或用詞上的錯(cuò)誤?! ?4)看單詞拼寫、字母大小寫是否有錯(cuò),標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號有無遺漏或用錯(cuò)等等?! ?5)注意時(shí)態(tài)、語態(tài)、人稱是否上下文一致?! ?1 / 11