【正文】 estions about our machines. Thank you very much.Best regards,那個(gè)均質(zhì)機(jī)的確比較特殊，這個(gè)行業(yè)我不懂，只能盡量幫你改一下郵件了：Dear Mr. Mukund Kamath,Glad to get your contact info from Indiamart!We supply homogenizers and ice cream freezing machine with good quality and very petitive price. Hope to be a partner of your pany!Ecatalog will be provided if needed. Email me or just call me directly. Thank you!Best regards,Mandy******Co., Ltd.Add: ***Tel: ***Fax: ***Mail: ***Web: ***這樣是不是簡(jiǎn)潔很多了？而且你要表達(dá)的東西，我上面的幾句話全部表達(dá)出來(lái)了。fabulous, coincidently這類詞不要用。郵件一定要簡(jiǎn)單，明白，通俗易懂，連老外的小學(xué)生都看得懂。案例三：、請(qǐng)幫忙看下我的回復(fù)信呢，我的客戶主要是詢盤(pán)過(guò)來(lái)的，我回復(fù)過(guò)去怎么沒(méi)有人回復(fù)我呢？Dear xxxxGood Day to you! Thanks for your interest in our KL4LM mining light from Alibaba. This is sherry, the sales representative of Explosionproof Electric Co.,Ltd. Nice to serve for you. The attachments are our quotation form and specification of KL4LM mining light. Please check. Hope I can get your any kind opinion. xxxx, to help you learn our pany better , please refer to the below introduction: 1basic information China DIANGUANG Explosionproof Electric Co., Ltd established in1965, specializes in producing explosionproof electrical products. Now group has Ramp。D center in Shanghai, six branches in Zhejiang and Anhui. the annual turnover has reached to almost 1billion RMB. 2products Our products mainly include mininglamps, mining switch, mining soft starter,mining electromagnetic starter, mining substation and others3quality guarantee 1)we have an independent raw material inspecting office to guarantee the quality of raw material。 2)during the production process, the workers strictly carry every producing rules。 3)we import advanced machines to help the accurate operation。 4) every product should be tested before delivering out producing workshop. 4products supply the month production quantity can reach to 20,000 sets,so we can supply our customers ina short time. 5innovation Shanghai DIANGUANG Explosionproof Technology Co.,Ltd isour Ramp。D center, where gathers lots excellent engineers to lead the explosionproof line. For more information, wele to visit our website: we have the ability to supply our customers good quality, good price petitive products. sincerely, Miss SherryCompany: Adress:WebsiteTel:Mobile:Fax:Email:MSN:你好，你的郵件實(shí)在太長(zhǎng)了，我都要看不下去了，老外那么懶，很難讓他們皺著眉頭耐著性子看下去的。我建議你看看我前面說(shuō)的10個(gè)問(wèn)題，盡量改一改郵件，把它縮短80%，最多最多3段話要寫(xiě)清楚。 我說(shuō)的比較直接，你別生氣哦~~案例四：老哥，這是我剛寫(xiě)給英國(guó)商人的一個(gè)開(kāi)發(fā)信，能指教一下嗎？是不是太長(zhǎng)了？Hi Sir or Madam who concerns：Thanks for your concerns,we learn your pany who is a leading retailer of contemporary and traditional bathrooms.Our pany is specialized in cast iron bathtubs for 17 pany adopted ISO 9001 quality management standards and ISO 14001 Environmental Management Standard.Some pictures in the attachment ,and I remend you which are luxury bathtubs NH1007/NH1008 and simple cast iron bathtub NH008 Danli.Should you have any questions, pls do not hesitate to contact me. Best regars我簡(jiǎn)單地改了一下，你看看哦：Dear sir,Glad to hear that you39。re the leading retailer of bathrooms! We specialize in cast iron bathtubs for 17 years, and hope to find a way to cooperate with you!Attached some pictures for your review. Please contact me if any questions.Thanks and best regards,***你還是寫(xiě)得太長(zhǎng)了，能用1個(gè)詞絕對(duì)不用兩個(gè)，能用1句話寫(xiě)清楚就絕不用兩句，寫(xiě)郵件要惜字如金??！案例五：Dear Puchaing Manager: We get to konw that you required the 11/ kV (250) KVA transformer before,Do you still need it? As an exporter and manufacturerSunel Transformer Co.,Ltd. ,mainly specialize in dry type transformer and superhigh voltage transformer. Main products include resin cast dry transformer﹑nomex insulated dry transformer﹑110KV/220KV station power transformer as well as custommade transformer etc. Among our main customers are world famous panies such as Japanese YASKAWA and FUJI, German HANSEN and SIEMENS, French SCHNEIDER. Also we are ISO9001，PCCC and CTQC certified and could provide the items with a petitive price. The enclosed is some of our items you maybe interested in. Warmly wele to visit our web to get more info:, feel free to contact to establish business relations with your corporation. Pls reply asap so we can make you our firm offer as per your detailed requirements. Looking forward to your prompt reply. Thanks in advance.非常希望LZ有空能給予指正。謝謝 不錯(cuò)不錯(cuò)，你是我看到的幾封開(kāi)發(fā)信里面寫(xiě)得最好的了！可以不用改。怪不得是export manager啊，哈哈~ 我想指出一點(diǎn)的是，老外更在意的，并不是你工廠的ISO9001之類的東西，這些都是虛的。如果你是一個(gè)不錯(cuò)的工廠，被哪些大客人驗(yàn)過(guò)廠，比ISO重要100倍！ 如果你通過(guò)BSCI驗(yàn)廠，或者Disney驗(yàn)廠，或者Walmart驗(yàn)廠，那就把這句寫(xiě)上去！ 如：We already passed the factory audit from BSCI, with the scores ***(BSCI驗(yàn)廠是有分?jǐn)?shù)的，而且德國(guó)Lidl指定BSCI驗(yàn)的，如果你分?jǐn)?shù)還不錯(cuò)，說(shuō)明你的產(chǎn)品已經(jīng)能進(jìn)德國(guó)主流市場(chǎng)了。相比之下，BV和SGS之類的就稍微弱一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)。)又如：We39。re the supplier of Walmart, and already passed the FE from them.案例六：哇LX好厲害啊~~~~值得讓我這個(gè)新人學(xué)習(xí)啊，剛開(kāi)始接觸這一行，什么都不會(huì)，我也想得到LZ的指導(dǎo)指導(dǎo)下面是我從展會(huì)回來(lái)的開(kāi)發(fā)信，希望樓主幫我修改指點(diǎn)一下~~~小女子感激萬(wàn)分啊~~~~Dear Alex:How are you ? I sincerely everything goes well with you.My name is Sandy who have your name cardat the 2010 HongKong Electronic Fair .We have availed ourselves of this opportunity to wite you in the hope of establishing business relations with you.Our pany is a factory whic specialied in Parking Sensor System from China. We operate in accordance with ISO9001:2000 standards,which 01 100056417 issued by TUVGermany,and our products (LED , VFD ,LCD, TFT series and License frame series) are CE,FCC,FCCID approved.I remember that you were interested in our Fun Mini DVR at the 2010 Hk Electronic Fair . Please feel free to contact me if you want to know more about it,and I will be so peasured to sendthe details to you.Attach some pictures of DVR as follows: Also you can get more imformation from our website : Your early reply will be our highly appreciated.Best regards,SandySales assistant我?guī)湍愀囊幌拢懵聊プ聊タ?，多?xiě)多練，就會(huì)寫(xiě)得比我好了：Hi Alex,How are you doing? Glad to get your name card from HK fair.T