【正文】 ok at this. 39。39。Don39。t let your soul mate slip away.39。39。 It39。s almost a threat. It39。s like, 39。39。We have him. He39。s just waiting for you. 39。39。But hurry, 39。cause he39。s slipping away. There he goes.39。39。 Soul mates only exist in the Hallmark aisle in Duane Reade drugs. I disagree. I believe there39。s that one perfect person out there to plete you. And if you don39。t find him? What, you39。re inplete? It39。s so dangerous. All right, first of all, the idea that there39。s only one out there...why don39。t I just shoot myself right now? I39。d like to think people have more than one soul mate. I agree, I39。ve had hundreds. And if you miss one, along es another, like cabs. That is not how it works. Okay. But you39。re still looking outside yourself. It39。s saying that you39。re not enough. Are you enough? Actually, today she39。s too much. The bad thing about the one perfect soul mate...is that it39。s so unattainable. You39。re being set up to fail. Exactly, and you feel bad about yourself. It makes the gap between the Holy Grail and the assholes even bigger. I don39。t care. I believe in soul mates. I thought Trey was mine. But I don39。t think that a soul mate would...on your leg. Really true. There39。s got to be that someone out there who39。s just perfect for me. Maybe I should keep looking. Here you go. Okay, we39。re filling this out. I39。m not in the mood. Not for you, for her. Okay! No. Yes. 39。39。Age. Check box. 39。39。20 to 25, 25 to 30, 30 to 34.39。39。 Not after next week. Birthday girl. 39。39。35 to 44.39。39。 Honey, wele to my box. Soul mate. Two little words, one big concept. A belief that someone, somewhere...is holding the key to your heart, and your dream house. All you have to do is find them. So where is this person? And if you loved someone and it didn39。t work out...does that mean they weren39。t your soul mate? Were they just a runnerup contestant in this game show... called 39。39。Happily Ever After39。39。? And as you move from age box to age box...and the contestants get fewer and fewer...are your chances of finding your soul mate less and less? Soul mates, reality or torture device? What about a little birthday dinner? ll Cantinori, something nice. I39。m not sure I want to do anything. I39。m kind of into laying low. Laying low or feeling low? No, I39。m fine. Come on, you39。ve got to do better than that. You39。ve got to grab 35 by the balls and say, 39。39。World, I39。m 35!39。39。 Okay, calm down, Auntie Mame. I39。ll put the dinner together. All you have to do is show up. Just close friends, very fabulouslite. All right. That sounds fun, thank you. Should I invite Big? What, are you slowly trying to kill me on the way to lunch? Technically you are friends now, right? You know, a phone call here and there. It39。s friendly. Do you think I should I invite him? How should I know? When I39。m done with them, I39。m done with them. Maybe not. And I think he39。s still in London. Let39。s just keep it to low maintenance friends. All right. Wele. Come in. He is hot. He is a priest. He is a hot priest. Look at his robe. It39。s so 39。39。Robin and his merry men.39。39。 Est225。 bien, gracias. You tell them, Friar Fuck. Okay, sister, let39。s go. I39。m not gonna lose my table at Pastis...so you can cruise a holy man. What street are we on, again? That Sunday, Samantha went to church. Good morning. Good morning. I noticed all the good work you39。re doing in the neighborhood.. and I just stopped to see if I could be of service. We could use another hand in the kitchen. I39。m in public relations. And I was thinking maybe I could help put a benefit together. Something classy, respectful. I can guarantee Donald Trump and Marlo Thomas. Thank you, but here at all Souls, we39。re a little more lowkey than that. We39。re more about collecting food, canned goods to feed to the needy. So... I love your robe. This is what we wear. I39。m in the Franciscan order founded by St. Francis. The robe is....Do you really want to hear about this? Tell me more about this St. Francis. He lived his life based on the vows of poverty and chastity. Here. It39。s St. Francis giving his coat to the poor. Samantha Jones, public relations. lf you change your mind about the benefit...or anything. And just like that, Samantha went from Mr. No Soul... to Mr. all Souls. After church, most people go out for pancakes. Samantha wasn39。t most people. Samantha, your face is glowing. Did you get a facial or something? I masturbated all afternoon. All right, then. Seriously? All afternoon? Two, two and a half hours. Who39。s got that kind of time? I like to get in and get out. I enjoy a quickie every now and then... but when it39。s good like today, I go with it. I masturbated to my priest. Your priest? Friar Fuck. I think we might have to get her a crash helmet. You have a priest? No. She wants him, but she can39。t have him. It39。s all very Thorn Birds. Inmy fantasy...he tears the food I39。m carrying for the homeless...out of my arms, rips open my dress... lays me down in the street and enters me. What do you do for the next 2 hours and 20 minutes? Stop, you are talking about a priest. It39。s a fantasy. I can masturbate to whomever I like. It39。s imagination. It39。s fun and perfectly healthy. Who do you all fantasize about? Russell Crowe. Jinx! You owe me a coke. That39。s amazing. What did women do before Russell Crowe? Gee Clooney. Clooney39。s like a Chanel suit. He39。ll always be in style. I used to masturbate to a busboy who was rude to me once. What do you think that means? Fine, the cheese stands alone. Come on, Charlotte. Get that judgmental puss off, and join in. Who do you fantasize about? No, it39。s private. Come on, it can39。t be any worse than a priest and a busboy. We39。re not moving on till you tell us about one of your masturbation guys. It39。s not guys. Lately, it39。s just