【正文】 hone with needless conversations.12．對(duì)不熟悉的人寫一封內(nèi)容過分親密的信。 letters that are overly familiar to people they hardly know.13．不管自己了不了解，而任意對(duì)任何事情發(fā)表意見。 unsolicited opinions on any subject under the sun,without regard to their knowledge.14．公然質(zhì)問他人意見的可靠性。 questioning the soundness of others39。 opinions.15．以傲慢的態(tài)度拒絕他人的要求。 requests from others in an arrogant manner.16．在別人的朋友面前說一些瞧不起他的話。 disparagingly of people in front of their friends.17．指責(zé)和自己意見不同的人。 people who disagree with them.18．評(píng)論別人的無能力。 on people39。s disabilities.19．當(dāng)著他人的面，指正部后和同事的錯(cuò)誤。 subordinates and colleagues in the presence of others.20．請(qǐng)求別人幫忙被拒絕后心生抱怨。 when requests for favors are refused.21．利用友誼請(qǐng)求幫助。 upon friendship in asking for favors22．措詞不敬或具有攻擊性。 profane or offensive language23．當(dāng)場(chǎng)表示不喜歡。 dislikes at a drop of a hat24．老是想著不幸或痛苦的事情。Dwelling on ills or misfortunes25．對(duì)政治或宗教發(fā)出抱怨。 about politics or religion26．表現(xiàn)過親密的行為。 general overfamiliarity如果你認(rèn)為這些都是一些小缺點(diǎn)的話，那就錯(cuò)了。因?yàn)?這些缺點(diǎn)的混合速度是非?？斓?你愿意和平常就顯露出三“種缺點(diǎn)的人交往嗎?這些缺點(diǎn)意味著，缺乏感受和細(xì)心體諒 的能力，并且會(huì)使人對(duì)這種人的智慧產(chǎn)生懷疑，任何想要培 養(yǎng)具吸引力個(gè)性的人，都應(yīng)遠(yuǎn)離這些缺點(diǎn)。If these faults seem small to you,consider how quickly they pound one you want to be associated with someone who displayed just three of them regularly? They reveal a lack of perception and careful consideration that undermines one39。s confidence in another39。s mental powers. Anyone who desires an attractive personality will avoid them all.回目錄 正義感正義感A keen Sense of justice除非你能以公正的態(tài)度對(duì)待他人，否則即無法培養(yǎng)出吸引入的個(gè)性，而且也無法達(dá)到明確目標(biāo)，正義感的一項(xiàng)不可或缺的根本要素，就是“有意的誠實(shí)”。Unless you deal justly with others you cannot hope either to cultivate an attractive personality or to succeed in your definite major essential ponent of a keen sense of justice is a dedication to intentional honesty.許多人把誠實(shí)當(dāng)做是一種權(quán)宜之計(jì)，但由于這種誠實(shí)態(tài)度彈性太大，致使它可能會(huì)被扭曲成謀求自己利益的一種手 段。在培養(yǎng)坦白的說話態(tài)度時(shí)，你就已經(jīng)在實(shí)踐有意的誠實(shí) 方面，跨出了重要的一步；你必須堅(jiān)持這種誠實(shí)美德，并且無論是否會(huì)為你帶來立即的好處都要實(shí)踐它。Many people are honest for the sake of expediency, but this kind of honesty is so flexible that it can be contorted to serve in any situation which furthers their cultivating frankness of speech,you are already taking an important step in practicing intentional honesty。you must adhere to that honesty so closely that you practice it under and circumstance,whether or not it promises you any immediate gain.即使正義感無法使你抓住每一次的獲利的機(jī)會(huì)，但它卻 能為你帶來下列的實(shí)際好處。Even if a keen sense of justice prevents you from seizing every opportunity, it carries with it a host of practical benefits:1．它為你建立起信心的基礎(chǔ)；沒有了信心你將無法培養(yǎng)出吸引人的個(gè)性。It establishes the basis of confidence,without which you cannot have an attractive personality2．它建立起深具魅力的誠摯和健全的性格。It builds a fundamentally sincere and sound character,which by itself is a powerfully attractive trait3．它不僅會(huì)吸引他人的注意，同時(shí)還提供獲得真正而 是永久不變之個(gè)人利益的機(jī)會(huì)。It not only attracts people but offers opportunities for real and lasting personal gain4．它使你培養(yǎng)出自立和自重精神。It builds your sense of selfreliance and selfrespect，并因而使你的行動(dòng)更為迅速， 因?yàn)榇藭r(shí)你的動(dòng)機(jī)和欲望比以往更加清晰。It strengthens your relationship with your conscience and thus allows you to act more promptly since your motives and desires are clearer。It attracts worthwhile friends and discourages you enemies。It opens your mind to faith，想想看有多少杰 出人物因?yàn)檠孕胁簧鞫呱献晕覛缰?。It protects you from destructive how often people of prominence are laid low by revelations of impropriety。It inspires you to move toward your definite major purpose with greater personal initiative正義感不僅是一種獲得實(shí)質(zhì)利益的工具，同時(shí)還能強(qiáng)化 各種人際關(guān)系，它驅(qū)除貪婪和自私，并使你更了解你的權(quán)益 和責(zé)任，而所有其他個(gè)性也將因?yàn)橛辛苏x感而更有力量。A keen sense of justice is not merely a tool for gaining material enhances every human discourages avarice and selfishness and gives you a much better understanding of your rights,privileges,and it,every aspect of attractive personality grows stronger.回目錄 情緒的控制情緒的控制在我們做的事情當(dāng)中，有許多都受到感情的影響。由于 我們的感情可為我們帶來偉大的成就，也可能使我們失敗， 所以，我們必須了解，要控制自己的感情，首先應(yīng)該做的是，了解對(duì)我們有刺激作用的感情有哪些?我們可將這些感 情分為七種消極和七種積極的情緒。Much of what we do is directed by our our feelings can lift us to great achievements or hurl us down to defeat,we owe it to ourselves to understand and control first step is to identify the feelings which motivate are seven negative emotions and seven positive.七種消極情緒為：There seven negative emotions are: The seven positive emotions are:1．恐懼 Fear2．仇恨 Hatred3．憤怒 Anger4．貪婪 Greed5．嫉妒 Jealousy6．報(bào)復(fù) Revenge7．迷信 Superstition 七種積極情緒為：1．愛 Love2．性 Sex3．希望 Hope4．信心 Faith5．同情 Sympathy6．樂觀 Optimism7．忠誠 Loyalty以上14種情緒，正是你人生計(jì)劃成功或失敗的關(guān)鍵， 他們的組合，既能意義非凡，又能夠混亂無章，完全由你決定。These fourteen emotions are the letters of the alphabet with which you will write your plan for success or can be bined meaningfully or chaotically.上面每一種情緒都和心態(tài)有關(guān)，這也就是為什么我一直強(qiáng)調(diào)心態(tài)的原因。這些情緒實(shí)際上就是個(gè)人心態(tài)的反映，而心態(tài)是你可以組織、引導(dǎo)和完全掌控的對(duì)象。為了達(dá)到組織、引導(dǎo)和掌控的目的，你必須控制你的思想，你必須對(duì)思想中產(chǎn)生的各種情緒抱持著警覺性，并且視其對(duì)心態(tài)的影響是好是壞而接受或拒絕。樂觀會(huì)增強(qiáng)你的信心和彈性，而仇根會(huì)使你失去寬容和正義感。如果你無法控制自己情緒，你的一生將會(huì)因?yàn)椴粫r(shí)的情緒沖動(dòng)而受害。Each emotion is related to mental attitude,and that is why I have placed so much stress on the character of one39。s mental emotions are nothing but reflections of your mental attitude,which you can organize,guide,and pletely do so,you must take control of your present there,and embrace or reject them on the basis of their contribution to your mental will increase your confidence and flexibility。hatred will undermine your tolerance and keen sense of you do not take this control,you are condemning yourself to an entire life buffeted by the winds of emotional whim.如果你正在努力控制情緒的話，可難備一張圖表，寫下你每天體驗(yàn)并且控制情緒的次數(shù)，這種方法可使你了解情緒發(fā)作的頻繁性和它的力量。一旦你發(fā)現(xiàn)刺激情緒的因素時(shí)，便可采取行動(dòng)除掉這些因素，或把它們找出來充分利用。If you find yourself struggling to gain this control,pile a chart on which you note every day the number of times you experience and act on an a not of circumstances which inspire the emotion. This will give you tremendous insight into the frequency and power of your you know which forces trigger your emotions,you can act to eliminate them or to seek them out and use them.