【正文】 aph about ―impoverished childhood‖ is once again very hackneyed. ） As the best student of my high school, I was well prepared in 199x when I took the National University Entrance Examinations, held nation wide once every year to screen high school graduates for higher education. I ranked the first in overall scores of (among) the students who entered the Department of Chemistry in Big Name University that year in my province. On the strength of these scores, I gained acceptance into the Department of Chemistry to begin my intense undergraduate chemistry study. I was proud of this since the Department of Chemistry of the Big Name University ranks 1st together with Peking University in chemistry education and research in P. R. China, and it has raised (produced) thousands of scholars. (The last sentence is unclear.) （ Editor‘s ment： The above paragraph is really too wordy. The author wants to say two things: he did well in the national examinations and he did so well that he won acceptance into the best chemistry department in China. We only need two sentences.） In 199x, ranking first in the National University Entrance exams among those applying from my province to study Chemistry at the Big Name University, I embarked on my university career. My excellent test scores guaranteed me a position on the undergraduate course at one of China‘s top chemistry departments. Since I entered into the university, I have studied diligently and conscientiously. With that, I have acquired a solid background in chemistry, mathematics and physics. (I studied diligently and conscientiously, acquiring a sound knowledge of not only chemistry but also physics and math. （ Editor‘s ment： We can bine the above two sentences, using participial phrases, which is often beyond the capability of university students.） With an overall GPA of ,I have, for four years running, stayed among the top 5% of the class in all subjects of my undergraduate studies. The scholarships and honors are the reflections of my achievements. (Scholarships and awards I received reflect my devotion to my subject and also the fact that I consistently remained within the top 5 percent of undergraduate students. ) I have not confined myself to my coursework, however, I have frequented the library and probably read more chemistry literature than most of other students. By satisfying my thirst for more knowledge, I have kept myself abreast of the new developments in chemistry around the world. (To quench my thirst for knowledge, I regularly visited the university library where I kept myself abreast of new chemistry developments around the world. ) （ Editor39。 對(duì)所選學(xué)校的了解這一項(xiàng)在我國(guó)的申請(qǐng)者中也是很薄弱的。 我們?cè)陉愂鲎约旱膭?dòng)機(jī)時(shí) ，至少要給讀者這么一個(gè)印象：即你所說的比較可信。 切忌在 PS 中玩弄文字，任何玩弄文字的人都注定會(huì)出力不討好 。 怎樣寫好 PS — 我的心得 我們并不一定要按照國(guó)外的定義來承襲他們的寫作風(fēng)格。 奉勸大家在寫作時(shí)，切忌寫得脫離實(shí)際。 先談開頭部分的 ―公式化 ‖的寫作。 至于 GRE 分?jǐn)?shù)的重要性則很難確定。 個(gè)人陳述部分 克服思維慣性，認(rèn)識(shí) ―包裝 ‖的重要性 我國(guó)高中畢業(yè)生所面對(duì)的高考錄取制度幾乎是完全按照分?jǐn)?shù)來取人的， 但 國(guó)外大學(xué)的錄取情況卻有很大的不同 。許多申請(qǐng)到獎(jiǎng)學(xué)金的同學(xué)，他們的GRE 分 數(shù)大概只有 1900 分，還有一些學(xué)基礎(chǔ)學(xué)科的學(xué)生， GRE 分?jǐn)?shù)甚至不到 1900 分卻依然拿到了全額獎(jiǎng)學(xué)金，并且還是在北美排名相當(dāng)不錯(cuò)的學(xué)校的獎(jiǎng)學(xué)金。最嚴(yán)重的是引用名言。 我在本書中所說的 ―包裝 ‖，是指申請(qǐng)者如何在申請(qǐng)材料中合理地挖掘并且有力地展現(xiàn)自己真正的優(yōu)點(diǎn)和潛能，以此幫助自己在眾多的申請(qǐng)者中脫穎而出。 但是我們?cè)谌魏螘r(shí)候都不要忘了 Personal Statement 的本義。 現(xiàn)在來談 PS寫作的第二步： Positioning（定位）。 ‖ 如果你的申請(qǐng)動(dòng)機(jī)比較鼓舞人 (Inspiring )，就可以寫。 很多學(xué)校也希望你不僅僅是為了出國(guó)留學(xué)而隨便選個(gè)學(xué)校。s ment： To read in the library is nothing special. ） On the other hand, I did not allow my heavy load of study to deter me from taking part in extracurricular activities. My heavy workload did not deter me from participating in extracurricular activities. As the monitor of the class and a member of the Students Union, I honed my anizing skills and augmented my work efficiency. As class monitor and a member of the Students Union, I honed my anizing (and munication) skills and augmented my working capacity. I learned to be both a team leader and a team player. Convinced that the meaning of life es from helping others, I have always been most obliging wherever anyone es to me for help, which has won me lots of friends. My belief that in order to enjoy a good life, we must help others has won me a close circle of friends. Such personality, bined with my intellectual vigor and determination, should stand me ready for any challenges. The bination of my strong personality, my intellectual vigor and my sheer determination stand me in good stead to face any new challenges.（ Editor39。） In my research attempts, I utilized for the first time all my intellect and knowledge to deal with practical problems and explore new knowledge. (To me, no other endeavor than lab work provides the kind of intellectual challenge and excitement.) I can never fet the tremendous elation I experienced while working out something new and useful to the society. (I became addicted to the elation experienced when a solution to a seemingly insurmountable problem was found.) And to work with a group under the guidance of a prestigious scholar—how charming are the great joy and wisdom gained from it! 廢話。s ment：這一段具體談想去的學(xué)校以及原因，應(yīng)該單獨(dú)成一段，放在后面。s ment：The original is too week. Or, we can say, the Big Name stands out among universities in that it emphasizes the need of scientific experimentation.） In the first semester of college life, we were told to do all the experiments independently. （ Editor39。如果對(duì)這個(gè)學(xué)校沒有進(jìn)行過什么研究，那就不要寫下面這段話，什么你們學(xué)校有一流的師資 (most seasoned faculty)，有一流的設(shè)備(first class facilities)， 有一切為學(xué)生服務(wù)的精神 (catering to students‘ needs)， 還有你們很注重多元化 (diversity) 等等。在專業(yè)方面的能力，第一項(xiàng)就是眼光。 在經(jīng)過前一階段認(rèn)真的反思，找到自己準(zhǔn)確的定位之后，我們就該進(jìn)入PS 寫作的第三步了，這就是確立文章的主題。作為出國(guó)材料的重中之重，你的任務(wù)就是要通過這一信件反映出你的個(gè)性。 下一個(gè)常見到的寫作模塊是談出國(guó)留學(xué)的動(dòng)機(jī)，也就是表決心 以上是我國(guó)學(xué)生在寫作 PS 時(shí)的幾種常見的模式化方式，希望同學(xué)們?cè)谝院蟮膶懽髦校从^一下自己是不是也犯了這樣的錯(cuò)誤，從而能夠做到心中 有數(shù)，以防再落入俗套。較為老套的話，在本來就篇幅有限的 PS 里實(shí)在沒有必要去說，它只能展現(xiàn)你的平庸無趣。但是一份草率，或者平庸，或者一看就是抄來的申請(qǐng)材料卻能讓你前功盡棄。 擁有一個(gè)好成績(jī)已遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)不是申請(qǐng)者制勝的法寶，對(duì)于同一所大學(xué)而言，如果兩個(gè)申請(qǐng)者的考試成績(jī)懸殊不太大，那么，申請(qǐng)