【正文】 re alone I felt. And it really hit me. I am 35 and alone. You are not alone. I know I have you guys, but....And really, I hate myself a little for saying this, but...it felt really sad... not to have a man in my life who cares about me. No special guy to wish me happy birthday. No goddamn soul mate. And I don39。m going to bed. I39。re ing uptown. Meet you at the coffee shop in 20 minutes. End of messages. Carrie? It39。m at the wrong place. Did you know there39。t wait for me. Happy birthday. I39。ll be 10 minutes late. The reservation line is busy, I39。m aware of. Let me check with the maitre . Okay, thanks. Can I bring you some champagne now? Not yet. Good, great, excellent. Hi. Sorry for holding the table. I can39。s 8:45 . The reservation was for 8:30 ., right? That39。s very kind. Thank you. I have a confession to make. I think about you other places than the market. Do you ever think about me? I believe that God made the body. And it39。s like I said to Joe. We can have kids...or we can have geous fabric without chocolate stains. Miranda realized it39。39。t know if I believe all that. Maybe there isn39。t feeling very Shecky. Actually, I39。re a friend. So em.. if you are back in town...it39。re still in England...but en.. it39。re not moving on till you tell us about one of your masturbation guys. It39。s like a Chanel suit. He39。s a fantasy. I can masturbate to whomever I like. It39。s good like today, I go with it. I masturbated to my priest. Your priest? Friar Fuck. I think we might have to get her a crash helmet. You have a priest? No. She wants him, but she can39。m in the Franciscan order founded by St. Francis. The robe is....Do you really want to hear about this? Tell me more about this St. Francis. He lived his life based on the vows of poverty and chastity. Here. It39。re doing in the neighborhood.. and I just stopped to see if I could be of service. We could use another hand in the kitchen. I39。 Est225。s so 39。m done with them, I39。39。ve got to grab 35 by the balls and say, 39。m not sure I want to do anything. I39。39。39。39。39。s got to be that someone out there who39。s so unattainable. You39。re still looking outside yourself. It39。s only one out there...why don39。s that one perfect person out there to plete you. And if you don39。cause he39。We have him. He39。 It39。39。t even have a name? I39。39。t working. Just please stop calling me. I39。m sorry, Charlotte, may I get you a hankie? It39。t. All right. You said you didn39。ve been awoke for hours, trying to figure out if we should stay together in spite of issues. I don39。t know what to say. And you39。39。39。m serious. Do any of you have a totally unremarkable friend...or maybe a house plant I could go to dinner with on Saturday night? She39。m not dating anyone. What about you, Miranda? Seeing anyone special? Actually, no. But I am seeing a whole bunch of unspecial guys. That39。re just talking and trying to figure things out. Just talking, nothing physical. I think it39。re just taking some time to figure things out. We got married really fast. Love at first sight. Didn39。s your husband? He39。m just a little overwhelmed. Danny! Couldn39。t mit. We39。s cute, straight, and we39。39。s one thing you should always take with you when you go out on the Saturday night —— Your friends. Why are we walking so fast? Are we in that big a hurry to get to an engagement party? What, don39。401 The Agony and the 39。re single... there39。Two souls, one thought.39。s beautiful. it’s a big, romantic gesture to express how they feel about each other. lf two people have only one thought between them...something is very wrong. Cab. I remember when Danny had more than one thought... and they all involved going up my ass. You had sex with Danny? He39。s Eve kiss. I showed him a boob in a coat check room. Just one? I sensed he couldn39。s here! Congratulations! Thanks. And this is my other half, Hailey. Congratulations. Hailey, this is Carrie and Charlotte. Miranda. Oh, Miranda. Right. Sorry. I39。m a TV agent, and I fucking love it. What a beautiful wedding ring. Where39。re separated. Not legally separated, nothing legal. God, no. We39。t always mean a marriage is working, does it? No it does not. We had some problems in the bedroom. But it was more about the fact that we got married so fast. So now we39。t talk to her. Charlotte realized that she and Trey were two souls... with too many thoughts. The minute we met it was perfect. I knew we were meant to be together. I could stop looking, I had found him. Congratulations! And what about you guys? I39。Are you special?” “Sorry, move along.” But if you have any unspecial friends, could you give them my number? I39。t see all those...39。ll find someone39。t need that judgment hanging over my head. So I go on the offensive and make them laugh. Okay, Shecky. You know what? Sometimes I think people in couples look at us mood see they had our lives. Nope. We make them unfortable, and they don39。re going to do. About what? Us! I39。t discuss my notes if you have a boner. Come inside. I cannot e inside, we are separated. I have more notes. I think about you every night. May I take off your panties? Don39。m not quite sure what to say. I39。re doing, it isn39。t one of them. It was a lovely, uneventful Saturday morning. Three lattes, two newspapers, and... one dating service application. 39。 Single? You don39。s the postal equivalent of a drive by shooting. I thought those 57 menus I get every day from Hunan Moonan were annoying. Look at this. 39。39。39。But hurry, 39。 Soul mates only exist in the Hallmark aisle in Duane Reade drugs. I disagree. I believe there39。s so dangerous. All right, first of all, the idea that there39。ve had hundreds. And if you miss one, along es another, like cabs. That is not how it works. Okay. But you39。s too much. Look the bad thing about the one perfect soul mate...is that it39。t think that a soul mate would...on your leg. Really true. The