【文章內(nèi)容簡介】 en to your sweet Red Riding Hood：Wow!What a big eyes!Wolf：I can see you pretty Red Riding Hood：Oh!What a big ：I can hug Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，邊摸邊說）Look!What a big hands?Wolf：(從床上跳起來說)I can eat you!Little Red Riding Hood：(拼命地跑)Oh！No!No!Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃狀，拍拍肚子說）It’s still like ：(一邊拿著槍，一邊做尋找狀出場)Where’s the wolf? Look!A door．(推門)The wolf is ：(發(fā)出呼呼的響聲)Hunter：(端起槍想打，又放下)What a big stomach!(摸摸Wolf的肚子)Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are must be hurry．(從桌子上拿起剪刀，舉起)Look!Scissors.(做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut, cut, Red Riding Hood/Grandma：Thank you．Hunter：Grandma ,give me some needles and thread．Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones．Grandma：(從桌子上拿來針線)Little Red Riding Hood：(搬來幾個(gè)石頭)One, two, ：(把小石頭裝進(jìn)Wolf的衣服里)Grandma：I39。ll thread ：(拿起槍)Woke up!Wolf：(起床，兩手托著大肚子)My stomach is so ：You big bad wolf, raise your arms!Wolf：(邊跑邊說)Help!Don’t shot me!Hunter：（開槍）Bang, bang!Wolf：(應(yīng)聲倒下)Hunter：The bad wolf is dead．Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma：Yeah!Thank you．Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）: Thank you英語搞笑話劇《孔雀東南飛》 Wanders every five miles焦仲卿Johnny(Jf or short)劉蘭芝 Lunch(Lf or short)焦母Johnny’s mother(JM fors hort)劉母Lunch’s mother(LM for short)太守之子Mayor’s son(MS for short)強(qiáng)盜Burglars(AB and C)Prologue(J作被打狀跑上臺,內(nèi)砸出一卷紙筒,J被打中,狼狽不堪)J: Everybody says that I’m henpecked,but in fact,I’m as strong as a tiger,(小聲)while my wife is WuSong.(指著上臺處的門大聲道)I’m not afraid of you!(內(nèi)砸出一臉盆,J接住當(dāng)成盾牌護(hù)著頭)Then,I’m afraid of whom? My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than this I do not only want her to be tender than she is not!Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!(內(nèi)又砸出一卷紙筒,擊中J)My God!Who can help me?(下)Act1(序幕結(jié)束時(shí),JM作竊聽狀)JM(拄拐棍上):I can!(對門內(nèi))Lunch!Lunch!Where are you? L(扎著圍裙,拿著鍋鏟,從門內(nèi)跳出來):I’m here!What’s up mum? JM:I’ve told you again and again that you should call me“my most beautifulgraceful and dearest motherinlaw”.L: most beautiful graceful and dearest motherinlaw,what’s up? JM:Since you married my son you have behaved so have been so rude,so brusque,so lazy?? L:But??JM:Never interrupt me!L:Never interrupt me!Since I married your son,that terrible Johnny,I have been working hard all day long,cooking and have raised tens of thousands of pigs and ducks and chicken and??JM:But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!L(生氣地?fù)]動著鍋鏟):Oh,you want a grandson,don’tyou?(開始解圍裙)Go and ask your ’m leaving!(扯下圍裙,扔在JM的臉上,下)Act2(LM坐在臺上打毛線,L拿著鍋鏟上)L:Mum,I’m back!LM:You are back? Why? What happened? L:I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–(驚訝,但隨即露出幸災(zāi)樂禍的神情):See!I have already told you!When you insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny,I told you that he is ugly stupid and poor,but you did not listen to at yourself?? L:But,mum??LM:Never interrupt me!L:Mum,I’m not interrupting just want to tell you that you are always right OK?And I’ll marry whom ever you want me (大喜):Nice girl!Just now,I met the mayor’s son in the said:“If your daughter Haven’t been married,I really really want to marry her!”Now you are free again,I’ll go and tell him.(下)L(驚愕):What?The mayor’s son?The most famous playboy in the neighborhood?(手中的鍋鏟掉在地上)What as illy thing I have done!(下)Act3(J睡眼惺忪上)J(邊走邊道)unch!Lunch!Where are my socks?(走了幾步,在地上撿起襪子)Here they are!(聞一下)Er!How smelly!They are still dirty!(突然想起)Lunch has gone!I have to wash them myself.(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起來)Oh,I’m so hungry!But there’s no breakfast!(撿起地上的圍裙)This is what Lunch always wears!I miss her so much,and her excellent cooking skill!Now she has have to cook for my mother and (上):Where’s my breakfast?Where’s Lunch?Hasn’t she got up yet? J:Mum,can’t you remember?Lunch has gone!JM(沉吟片刻):Well,to tell you the truth Johnny,as on without a wife is is a nice girl,go and take her back!J(立正敬禮):Yesmadam!Act4(J開心地走著，忽然跳出來三個(gè)強(qiáng)盜)A:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!The road is built by me!(抬腳重重地踩在一塊大石頭上)B:And I planted one tree!(亦抬腳踩在同一塊石頭上)C:If you want to go by this street(欲踩石頭，但踩到了A的腳)ABamp。C:Give us all your money!J(搜遍了每一個(gè)口袋，掏出1角硬幣):Is1mao enough?(三強(qiáng)盜暈倒?fàn)?，接著三人聚在一邊商?A:What bad luck!This guy is broken!B:If we can not rob any money today,we will have nothing to eat tonight!C:I heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry Miss LiuLanzhi next can go and rob the wedding!Aamp。B:Good idea!J(驚訝):What?What?Lunch is going to get married?It’s impossible!ABamp。C:Why?A pretty girl and a richman,what a good couple!J:But Lunch is my wife!We haven’t got divorced yet!(突然有了主意)I’ve got an idea!You are going to rob the wedding,don’tyou?I’ll go with take the money and I take the :Have you got any experience? J: I’ve got this!(J脫下鞋子從里面摸出一張支票，上書＄1，000，000)Act5(轉(zhuǎn)眼已到了婚禮之期．MS意氣風(fēng)發(fā)用紅綢牽著新娘上，J蓋著紅蓋頭極不情愿地被拉上臺)(J和三強(qiáng)盜躍至臺中)ABCamp。J:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!A:The road is built by me!B:AndI planted one :If you want to goby this streetJ:Give us all your money!(L聽到J的聲音，掀起了蓋頭)L(驚喜萬分):Johnny!(不顧一切地飛奔到J的身邊并躲到了的身后)(MS大怒，揮拳向J打來．J矮身一躲，MS打中了J身后的L，L暈倒)J(火冒三丈):How dare you beat my wife!（揮拳向MS沖去）(J與MS混戰(zhàn)，JM上，以拐杖擊暈MS)(J將MS胸前的新郎標(biāo)志扯下戴在自己胸前)J(扶起L，關(guān)切地問):Honey,how are you? L(哭狀):I hurt a lot!Jon’t cry ’ll go and fetch the medicine.(下)L(起身去追):Wait for me!(跑下)(音樂起 Can You Celebrate)可能人物是多了點(diǎn)，但是是很不錯(cuò)的劇本，你不妨去樂知網(wǎng)看看，也許有你要的東西Cocky Rooster Lon