【正文】 t.You know, I could...36600:29:59,865 00:30:01,665Can you pass a sobrietytest right now? Yep.36700:30:01,749 00:30:03,909Can you stand up straight?See how I e right back?36800:30:03,910 00:30:05,310And I e right back.Right. Wow.36900:30:05,311 00:30:06,304Can I get you a drink?37000:30:06,388 00:30:08,055It sounds great.37100:30:08,182 00:30:09,702I39。m one of those a cappella boys,and we39。s Boone39。s no backupdancers? Okay.31000:24:25,214 00:24:29,300Hello. My name is Lilly Onakuramara.I have gills like a fish.31100:24:30,469 00:24:31,594I39。ve Been Gone.28200:22:29,473 00:22:32,851If a group likes you, theywill contact you directly.28300:22:32,935 00:22:36,104My tonedeaf sidekick Justin herewill be collecting your information.28400:22:36,188 00:22:38,523If I could sing a lick,in any human way possible,28500:22:38,607 00:22:40,817I would, but I can39。s dark and dirty and has like,what, those three weirdos who work there?24700:19:18,491 00:19:19,991Well, four now.24800:19:20,076 00:19:23,662You gotta try something new,Bec. Join one club on campus.24900:19:23,746 00:19:26,915And if, at the end of a year,you still don39。s all dark and mysterious,23000:17:43,020 00:17:45,897then she takes off her glasses andthat amazingly scary ear spike23100:17:45,982 00:17:48,734and you realize that, you know,she was beautiful the whole time.23200:17:48,818 00:17:50,778I don39。t. Yeah, I do.21800:17:01,020 00:17:02,521He doesn39。t just standing here.21100:16:45,296 00:16:47,255Freshmen aren39。m gonna go introduce myself.18500:14:50,431 00:14:52,391Everybody be cool.It39。s all from our mouths.16100:13:34,898 00:13:35,898Yikes.16200:13:36,274 00:13:39,860There39。s your name?13600:12:00,470 00:12:01,720Fat Amy.13700:12:01,805 00:12:04,807Um... You callyourself Fat Amy?13800:12:05,016 00:12:08,060Yeah, so twig bitches like youdon39。vepuked your way to the bottom,11100:10:31,887 00:10:33,127you might actually consider me?11200:10:33,466 00:10:35,634I auditioned for you threetimes and never got in11300:10:35,719 00:10:38,220because you saidmy boobs look like baloney.11400:10:39,556 00:10:43,309The word39。t pledging SigmaBeta, you ain39。t actually care. Ljust wanted to say stepmonster.8300:08:38,101 00:08:40,352So, have you guys beenout on the quad yet?8400:08:40,437 00:08:43,063In the springtime, all thestudents study on the grass.8500:08:43,148 00:08:44,668I don39。m not a total nerd.6800:07:34,704 00:07:38,374I also happen to be superinto closeup magic.6900:07:40,210 00:07:42,586Dude, that39。re gonna go down this way,5200:06:02,544 00:06:05,224you39。m fine.2000:02:13,175 00:02:14,884Ouch! Boy, that hurt.2100:02:14,968 00:02:16,511Sexy mansplits.2200:02:16,595 00:02:18,596His pain is our gain, Gail.2300:02:34,696 00:02:35,905All right, good luck, guys!2400:02:38,826 00:02:40,326Good luck out there!2500:02:40,577 00:02:44,789Seriously, you girls areawesome... ly horrible.2600:02:44,873 00:02:48,167I hate you. Kill yourselves. Girl power!Sisters before misters!2700:02:50,587 00:02:54,131All right, ladies, it39。re so right,everything else seems wrong.600:00:59,101 00:01:02,228Boy, these Barden UniversityTreblemakers always thrill the judges.700:01:02,312 00:01:04,856And the ladies in the roomcannot get enough.800:01:04,940 00:01:06,065So true, John.900:01:06,150 00:01:09,819Nothing makes a woman feel more like agirl than a man who sings like a boy.1000:01:36,388 00:01:40,975Chloe, look at you. You39。t eff up your solo.1500:01:51,528 00:01:52,653I won39。t lose it.We know exactly where it is.4700:04:30,469 00:04:32,029It39。re at with English.6100:07:17,771 00:07:20,523There he is. I39。s dad.7700:08:14,411 00:08:16,078I teach Comparative Literature here.7800:08:20,041 00:08:23,002So, when did you get here?How did you get here?7900:08:23,295 00:08:26,297Took a cab. Didn39。re going to geta college education first.9400:09:05,754 00:09:08,631For free, I might add.End of story.9500:09:09,758 00:09:12,009I39。swhat being a man39。re the onewho got us into this hot mess.12100:10:59,071 00:10:59,700We39。re from?15100:12:59,988 00:13:02,906No. I did do Fiddler on theRoof, though, in high school.15200:13:02,991 00:13:06,702It was, like, me and some Aboriginals.It was really Jewish.15300:13:06,786 00:13:08,954It was fullon Jew.15400:13:09,873 00:13:13,375Hey, guys. All right,I39。s...16800:13:57,921 00:13:59,254So, are you interested?16900:14:00,089 00:14:01,632Sorry, it just, it39。t we just exchange s,19800:15:27,404 00:15:29,284and then totally hang outright now, together?19900:15:29,554 00:15:32,639No. Hard pass. Hard pass.20000:15:33,349 00:15:38,228What a nerd alert. Okay,guys, now let39。m Jesse.21500:16:54,347 00:16:55,931I39。ve been burned before.22400:17:16,536 00:17:20,872I do know you. I sang to you. Lremember because you were in a taxi.22500:17:20,998 00:17:24,126Wait, is your dad a taxi driver?No.22600:17:29,048 00:17:31,049This sucks. I wantedto play music.22700:17:31,718 00:17:36,179Not me. I39。t actually go to thatclass, will it still suck?23800:18:52,590 00:18:55,634Look, honey.College is... it39。m notleavi