【正文】 l, my husband was at work and the house was quiet. So I decided to make some tarts for tea. In a short time I was busy mixing butter and flour and my hands were soon covered with sticky pastry. At exactly that moment, the telephone rang. Nothing could have been more annoying. I picked up the receiver between two sticky fingers and was dismayed when I recognized the voice of Mrs Bates. It took me ten minutes to persuade her to ring back later. At last I hung up the receiver. What a mess! There was pastry on my fingers, on the telephone, and on the doorknobs. I had no sooner got back to the kitchen than the doorbell rang loud enough to wake the dead. This time it was the postman and he wanted me to sign for a registered letter ! Lesson55 Not a gold mine 并非金礦 Dreams of finding lost treasure almost came true recently. A new machine called 39。 I fot to put you off.39。 I said to the conductor as I got on the bus,39。but they did not steal anything.39。 if he picks a leaf, he will die. Many villagers believe that the tree has already claimed a number of victims. The vicar has been asked to have the tree cut down, but so far he has refused. He has pointed out that the tree is a useful source of ine as tourists have been ing from all parts of the country to see it. In spite of all that has been said, the touristshave been picking leaves and cutting their names on the treetrunk. So far, not one of them has been struck down by sudden death! Lesson59 In or out ？ 進來還是出去？ Our dog, Rex, used to sit outside our front gate and bark. Every time he wanted to e into the garden he would bark until someone opened the gate. As the neighbours plained of the noise, my husband spent weeks training him to press his paw on the latch to let himself in. Rex soon became an expert at opening the gate. However, when I was going out shopping last week, I noticed him in the garden near the gate. This time he was barking so that someone would let him out ! Since then, he has developed another bad habit. As soon as he opens the gate from the outside, he es into the garden and waits until the gate shuts. Then he sits and barks until someone lets him out. After this he immediately lets himself in and begins barking again. Yesterday my husband removed the gate and Rex got so annoyed we have not seen him since. Lesson60 The future 卜算未來 At a village fair, I decided to visit a fortuneteller called Madam Bellinsky. I went into her tent and she told me to sit down. After I had given her some money, she looked into a crystal ball and said: 39。I39。ll tell you where to get off,39。 Only 25 per cent a thief now!39。 39。 I am 100 per cent honest now!39。ll have to get off here,39。We are going back now,39。Where have you been hiding ?39。but only 5o per cent a thief!39。 39。t matter,39。cursed tree39。 I answered. Lesson51 Reward for virtue 對美德的獎賞 My friend, Herbert, has always been fat, but things got so bad recently that he decided to go on a diet. He began his diet a week ago. First of all, he wrote out a long list of all the foods which were forbidden. The list included most of the things Herbert loves: butter, potatoes, rice, beer, milk, chocolate, and sweets. Yesterday I paid him a visit. I rang the bell and was not surprised to see that Herbert was still as fat as ever. He led me into his room and hurriedly hid a large parcel under his desk. It was obvious that he was very embarrassed. When I asked him what he was doing, he smiled guiltily and then put the parcel on the desk. He explained that his diet was so strict that he had to reward himself occasionally. Then he showed me the contents of the parcel. It contained five large bars of chocolate and three bags of sweets! Lesson52 A pretty carpet 漂亮的地毯 We have just moved into a new house and I have been working hard all morning. I have been trying to get my new room in order. This has not been easy because I own over a thousand books. To make matters worse, the room is rather small, so I have temporarily put my books on the floor. At the moment, they cover every inch of floor space and I actually have to walk on them to get in or out of the room. A short while ago, my sister helped me to carry one of my old bookcases up the stairs. She went into my room and got a big surprise when she saw all those books on the floor. 39。 39。230 ! Lesson47 A thirsty ghost 嗜酒的鬼魂 A public house which was recently bought by Mr Ian Thompson is up for sale. Mr Thompson is going to sell it because it is haunted. He told me that he could not go to sleep one night because he heard a strange noise ing from the bar. The next morning, he found that the doors had been blocked by chairs and the furniture had been moved. Though Mr Thompson had turned the lights off before he went to bed, they were on in the morning. He also said that he had found five empty whisky bottles which the ghost must have drunk the night before. When I suggested that some villagers must have e in for a free drink, Mr Thompson shook his head. The villagers have told him that they will not accept the inn even if he gives it away. Lesson48 Did you want to tell me something? 你想對我說什么嗎？ Dentists always ask questions when it is impossible for you to answer. My dentist had just pulled out one of my teeth and had told me to rest for a while. I tried to say something, but my mouth was full of cottonwool. He knew I collected birds39。 she answered. Ten minutes later we walked out of the shop together. My wife was wearing a hat that looked like a lighthouse ! Lesson42 Not very musical 并非很懂音樂 As we had had a long walk through one of the markets of Old Delhi, we stopped at a square to have a rest. After a time, we noticed a snakecharmer with two large baskets at the other side of the square, so we went to have a look at him. As soon as he saw us, he picked up a long pipe which was covered with coins and opened one of the baskets. When he began to play a tune, we had our first glimpse of the snake. It rose out of the basket and began to follow the movements of the pipe. We w