【正文】 success. in the present society, what the children want to have most is the economic support from their parents, not their moral support or guidance. they would plain if your economic support is not up to their expectations. the love from uncles and aunties would naturally dwindle after they have had their own children. only the love from grandparents and grand parentsinlaw is pure and demands no repayment, and they are also too old to wait for any repayment. as for the distant relatives, their love depends on their needs, just as the old saying goes “the poor have no friends even if they live in downtown while the rich have distant relatives even if they live in deep mountains”. granny liu, a distant kinsfolk, in a dream of the red mansions , claims kinship with the wealthy jia family, thinking that she may benefit from it in some ways. liu might have run away without any traces if the jia family had been a poor one. another saying goes “close neighbors are better than distant relatives.” the most difficult is to manage the relatives when doing business together, just as what the tv series program liu laogen discloses. it is all right to stay poor together, but as soon as the business grows prosperous, the group will bee estranged and even dissolve because of the unfair distribution. family love is like a maze which we shouldn39。t go too far into it, otherwise, we39。ll surely get lost. love is a bilateral matter and unilateral love can only lead you to nowhere in spite of your good intentions. family love is, sometimes, like an arranged marriage, leaving no choices to you. due to the different experiences and tastes, staying together temporarily can be entertaining, while living together for a long time can only be boring due to the lack of mon interest and understanding. how can we municate with each other without understanding? parents have the duty to support the children who are not yet economically independent, and children have the responsibility to provide for the elderly parents who are lack of economic abilities to support themselves. except these two kinds of duties which we must fulfill, other kinds of love bee conventional formalities such as paying visit to the sick or the dead and giving presents to the newlyborn etc..no love among relatives has bee a normal phenomenon which needn39。t to be fussed about. what39。s worse is when love is contaminated by money. sooner or later we will get hurt. the sooner we get out of this net of love, the more we can preserve beautiful memories.we are not living in vacum, and the society is formed of various kinds of people. as long as we want to live, study, or work, we have to contact, municate and cooperate with others. those who enjoy mon interests, mutual understanding, mon undertakings and mon benefits bee friends.some friends are called fairweather friends, because they are together just for entertaining themselves by eating, drinking, and gossiping. once there39。s nothing to eat and drink, their friendship is finished. some are spiritual friends who share mon ambitions, pursuits and education. “they enjoy talking and laughing with the great talents and never make friends with the goodfornothings”. the best examples would be yu boya and zhong ziqi of the ancient times who are famous not only for their lofty music but mainly for their lofty characters and mutual understanding and appreciation. they cared very little about material wealth, so their friendship is known as “gentlemen39。s friendship as pure as water”. the third type of friendship belong to those who show their utter devotion to each other. they are ready not only to share weal and woe but also to die for each other, like the three brothers liu, guan and zhang in the novel romance of the three kingdoms. . we all wish to have this kind of friendship, but it39。s of great difficulty for the ordinary people to be as devoted as they were.fraternal love or friendship is wideranged and flexible. generally speaking, everyone is our friend, just as chairman mao says “our friends are all over the world”. but transcend age, sex, nationality, state and economic conditions. to them the most important is mon benefit, mon interest and understanding. friendship is formed during the course of studying, working and fighting. the battle panions who have survived many hazards usually enjoy longlasting friendship.however, fraternal love is not stable. being away for too a long time, losing all mon benefits, friends will bee estranged. once their interest has changed, they no longer understand each other, and even this would harm friendship. at all times and in all countries, many close friends and battle panions who once worked together and fought together became enemies in the end. quiet a few of the emperors in ancient china even killed those who had helped them found their dynasties. the taiping heavenly kingdom would not have failed if it hadn39。t been for the contending and massacring among the those who first rose in rebellion at the beginning of the uprising. what else we need to pay attention to is that some friends, after being away from each other for too long a time, have lost so much of their original characters that when meeting again, you will feel that you are still the same as you were, while they are no longer themselves. they may have the same feeling about you, so sometimes it39。s better not to meet each other again. as the chinese proverb goes “friendship can not last